My Aunt by relation, my Mother by nature…
12th March 2009 my aunt completed 1 year since God took her away from us to stay with Him, a heavenly abode. I was down that day thinking of last year the same time… there was just mourning, mourning and mourning, it was really unexpected and I can never forgive myself for not staying with her for a day or so even after she expressed her wish to. She wanted to be with me and my baby a lot. But we told her “next time when we come we will surely stay”, but unfortunately that next time never came and will never come in this world but ya there is hope that that next time will happen in heaven.
Sorry aunty we love you so much and miss you a lot. No one can replace you in our lives. You were more than an aunt to us, you were our mother. Your gentle smile, your forgiving nature, your all baring attitude, your love for all human beings be it your own or others, your caring nature, we miss all… everyone in our family and even the whole neighborhood can sense your loss till now. But you are so lucky because I know that God loved you so much that’s why He took you away from this painful world and has called you to His side. And I know that you requested Him for a grandchild and so God is going to give your son a baby very soon. We are all waiting to see the baby as well.
This weekend was good, I went for my first driving lessons, I stayed and played with my baby a lot. But we did not get together for our usual Saturday prayer as the brother was not able to attend due to his daughter’s fever. But usually even if he is not there we used to as a family get down on our knees but yesterday we were too busy with other things that we just ignored it and as a punishment from God may be later in the evening though I was there next to him my baby fell from the chair. I just grabbed him from the ground and burst out in tears and screams when I saw his mouth bleeding. Poor thing though he was hurt and crying as well when he saw me cry he stopped and looked as if nothing happened to him... God saved him from any serious injuries. Thank you Jesus!
At that time I couldn’t control my emotions. I felt my husband was accusing me and suddenly I felt lonely as if all my trust and faith in God had all leaked away. I felt as if I am not fit to be a mom. I cannot take care of my kid. I asked God “What wrong has he done Lord that you made me his mother. I am not fit to be a good mom…” See how Satan tried to empower me and I feel so ashamed to say that he was up to an extent successful in his work. Shame on me. Even in the morning till now that shadow of depression was over me. But this morning His words helped me in taking that shadow.
He spoke to me through Psalms 27: -
“The LORD is my LIGHT & my SALVATION”… verse 1
“The LORD is the STRONGHOLD of my Life”… verse 1 again
“The LORD will set me HIGH ON A ROCK”… verse 5
“The LORD will RECEIVE ME” (though my all may forsake me)… verse 10
So “Be STRONG take heart and WAIT FOR THE LORD”… verse 14
Thank you Lord for your WORD to me this day. Please change me more and more and help me reach to a greater level of continuous communications with You. Love You so much Father. Your Great and awesome.
Sorry aunty we love you so much and miss you a lot. No one can replace you in our lives. You were more than an aunt to us, you were our mother. Your gentle smile, your forgiving nature, your all baring attitude, your love for all human beings be it your own or others, your caring nature, we miss all… everyone in our family and even the whole neighborhood can sense your loss till now. But you are so lucky because I know that God loved you so much that’s why He took you away from this painful world and has called you to His side. And I know that you requested Him for a grandchild and so God is going to give your son a baby very soon. We are all waiting to see the baby as well.
This weekend was good, I went for my first driving lessons, I stayed and played with my baby a lot. But we did not get together for our usual Saturday prayer as the brother was not able to attend due to his daughter’s fever. But usually even if he is not there we used to as a family get down on our knees but yesterday we were too busy with other things that we just ignored it and as a punishment from God may be later in the evening though I was there next to him my baby fell from the chair. I just grabbed him from the ground and burst out in tears and screams when I saw his mouth bleeding. Poor thing though he was hurt and crying as well when he saw me cry he stopped and looked as if nothing happened to him... God saved him from any serious injuries. Thank you Jesus!
At that time I couldn’t control my emotions. I felt my husband was accusing me and suddenly I felt lonely as if all my trust and faith in God had all leaked away. I felt as if I am not fit to be a mom. I cannot take care of my kid. I asked God “What wrong has he done Lord that you made me his mother. I am not fit to be a good mom…” See how Satan tried to empower me and I feel so ashamed to say that he was up to an extent successful in his work. Shame on me. Even in the morning till now that shadow of depression was over me. But this morning His words helped me in taking that shadow.
He spoke to me through Psalms 27: -
“The LORD is my LIGHT & my SALVATION”… verse 1
“The LORD is the STRONGHOLD of my Life”… verse 1 again
“The LORD will set me HIGH ON A ROCK”… verse 5
“The LORD will RECEIVE ME” (though my all may forsake me)… verse 10
So “Be STRONG take heart and WAIT FOR THE LORD”… verse 14
Thank you Lord for your WORD to me this day. Please change me more and more and help me reach to a greater level of continuous communications with You. Love You so much Father. Your Great and awesome.
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